Hi, I’m Cheryl.
Welcome! Launched in 2017 as a community for creatives, people-pleasers and perfectionists. This site is a melting-pot of solutions on how to gain perspective and learn how we can beat perfectionism back into submission.
If you love ideas, advice and no BS then you’ll feel right at home here. 🙂 This is a space where it is more than okay to not have everything together.
I definitely don’t have all the answers. But I’m committed to finding and trying out different solutions.
And I love sharing these nuggets with you too in my weekly email newsletter.
So, why did I decide to start this site?
Well, shortly after arriving in China for the second time around, I noticed how I kept getting this kind of disappointed feeling.
You know the one, where your chest feels like it has a concrete slab on it, your brain is whirring like an approaching storm and all you want to do is hide away?
At first I couldn’t figure out what was making me so unhappy. I was back in an exciting foreign country, I’d just got married to my best friend and I’d been traveling for over a year.
What could I possibly be sad about?
I started to take note of when this feeling would visit me. And I realized it was nearly always when I felt I failed in something, or when things I had thought should pan out one (perfect) way, didn’t.
It was then it hit me. My perfectionist mindset had taken over.
I always knew I was a perfectionist. I would frantically clean the edges of the plates as I was serving dinner (heaven forbid there be a gravy drip), and I’d never feel satisfied with a painting, there was always something that it still needed.
But what I didn’t realize was how much it was effecting my everyday life. I didn’t realize how much stress I was causing myself.
The day I had a meltdown over apartments was when I decided, enough was enough. I couldn’t live my life this stressed out.
I needed to change. I was sick of pretending that everything was always hunky dory. And I was tired of the “it must just me, no one else feels like this” lie.
You know that warm feeling you get when you’re having one of those deep magical conversations with your friend? And it feels like arrows are flying back and forth between you as you connect and share insights?
Well, it was my love for these deep chats (usually late night talks) which encouraged me to start finding solutions to this perfectionism problem.
And … to actually share what I found. This one was a biggie.
Doing this meant admitting to my friends, family, and the random-person-I-met-once-and-now-we’re-FB-friends, that I didn’t have it altogether.
But despite what social media has us thinking sometimes, I couldn’t be the only one struggling with perfectionism, right?
I decided to bite the bullet. And that’s how it all began.
As well as writing here, I’m teaching English in Guiyang, China (and beginning a small forest sized collection of plants) and I’ve recently realized I buy far too many candles.
I’m compelled to write open and honestly, about how we can handle things less stressfully and live out the adventurous lives we want. Because being in our heads too much and feeling disappointed so often is no fun.
Do you want to be kept updated about my experiences abroad (undoubtedly crazy ones)?
Need help noticing where perfectionism creeps in and how you can deal with it?
Then I’d like to invite you to get sassy with perfectionism and subscribe to my weekly newsletters. Let’s get rid of this myth of needing to have your shit together and just be ourselves.
And hey, thanks for checking in. I really appreciate it … and you … and your thoughts … , so please feel welcome to comment/message away.